Following your Fear
You have all heard of facing your fears, and maybe those words work well enough for you. I mean as a motivational slogan.
Like when you are 8 years old and your mama tells you she will be waiting in the car while you go purchase a jug of 2%. “Face your fears darling”, she says as i slam the car door shut.
Maybe it is because i have heard about “facing” most of my life that there is a bit of an aversion to it these days. Face your fears. Face the facts. Face your parents. Face it you suck. Face it you will never be an astronaut.
I just had to look up “face” in the dictionary. After writing it so many times it began to sound like gibberish in my mind.
Dictionary.com definition of face: confront and deal with or accept a difficult or unpleasant task, fact, or situation.
Am i the only one that feels like confrontation does not scream motivation? Or that accepting and dealing with something leaves a feeling of dissonance and creates a desire for rebellion?
When i hear the word “face” in my head it is always accompanied with a self righteous attitude. Its like my Igor telling me bossily what i must be confronting and accepting. Igor is my ego by the way.
So if not face, what else is there?
Lately, I have been following my fears. After years of denying, hiding, and running from my fears this new endeavor has been HUGE for me.
The big difference between following and facing fears is curiosity. There was no warm regard for fears when i had to "face” them. It was very much push, shove,and nervous system override.
But following my fears begs me to slow down and with a settled nervous system ask some simple questions ..questions that lead me to uncovering gems of possibility that i never knew were there.
If you are damn tired of facing your fears and would like to follow them instead, below are some inquiries for you.
Why do i hold this fear in my heart?
What would happen if i took a step toward this fear?
What would i lose following this fear?
What would i lose by not following this fear?
What does this fear keep me safe from?
Who would i be without this fear?
Fears that i have followed: fear of being seen, fear of speaking up, fear of failing, fear of getting it wrong..
I will leave you with this poem by Erin Hansen
There is freedom waiting for you, on the breezes of the sky, and you ask, "What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?
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